Woman Everyone Call Mad

[2016 Feb Update: At prata dinner on day of mom's funeral (CNY eve), heard that Tian won a consolation prize for writing. The topic was her mom not allowing her to go to her grandpa's home. At breakfast 2nd CNY day, I was surprised her dad was not happy with me reminding the kids a few of the things I taught her which included 'beware of people who hee-hee-ha-ha with you all the time. That applies to home, school, work, and between countries' He pointed a finger at me and walked off. May have to do with this.... Also saw a new face last year at Tian's grandpa house and that red flag got much bigger!]


Driving home with CPM for dad's 7th week commemoration. Discussed various things. Told her about my exchange with CPQ (when dad passed away) on not to be so simplistic with reading other people. This world is not as simplistic as people like CPQ thinks.

I was trying to teach kids to beware when dealing with religious organisations as history shows that they are no different from any money making institutions and may be worse because most normal businesses offer real products and services for a price but religious organisations offer not just only nice and comforting words (which cost them nothing) but are also convenient hiding places for many dubious characters and dirty business (like paedophiles) because simplistic people take them as 'holy'.

Throughout history, all religions have to offer humanity is nice words but they cannot provide real improvement to our lives - Isaac Assimov (roughly as I remembered it from one of his books)

The greatest tragedy in mankind's entire history may be the hijacking of morality by religion - Arthur C. Clarke

As regards the skill of reading people, I told CPM that most people (80%) cannot do so accurately. Such skills are rare and experts are well paid. If CPQ was so good as to tell me that she was sure that all the people she met casually at Fa Gu San were good people, she would be sitting on some well paid job!

(During a character typing session at work, the facilitator said the Singapore government deploys highly paid spotters well trained in reading body language at Changi Airport. That's one reason why there is no need for strict baggage checks. The spotters do the first screening and they only do thorough checks on those picked up by those spotters)

Explained to her that's why I warned Tian a few months back when she told me about a 'mad' woman in her paternal side of family. Gave her the background below.

But despite all those 'signs' I recounted, CPM still argued with me and said my conclusion was wrong.

She said man showed her messages from woman that proved that woman was not normal etc and look like him does not mean his etc.

I said don't be stupid. I looked more like my father than his brother and his brother's son looked like him and not my father! I have not seen that woman's husband so CPM can compare the looks herself and decide.

I am very sure of it and it would be stupid of her to refuse to heed my view and at least exercise caution. Warned her that I have nothing at stake whichever way the truth is but she has something at stake - her daughter! If my view is indeed the case, who knows what's the limit.


Background:

A few months before dad's passing, I was talking Tian's father and somehow one of her uncle was mentioned. Tian who was next to us suddenly interjected and said one of her aunt-in-laws is mad. Curious, I asked her what she meant.

Apparently, that woman claimed she had a 'special' relationship with that uncle who is the younger brother of that woman's husband. So I asked Tian if that woman made the same claim about her father. She said no. Then how about other uncles. No.

I then told her that in that case that woman is not mad. Mad people makes wild accusations against people at random and not against a specific individual. Reminded her about a woman at nearby coffee shop that scolded her mother recently. That, I told Tian, was a mad woman. She just picked anyone off the street.

I noticed that her father also kept quiet all the while and pretended not to hear anything! Which confirms a suspicion I had for many years.

I first met that uncle when Tian was about 4 or 5 years old. I was not familiar with who is who within that family then. Pointing to a boy at her grandfather's home, I asked him an innocuous question: is that your son? He said no and walked off. I immediately realized I hit something raw. I asked that because that boy looked very much like him (not Tian's father for example)! His response raised a red flag.

After that, when I run into him during my other visits I noticed he would avoid me or discussion (see Fifth Amendment). Which to me was more red flags!

As a result, I was quite certain my initial suspicion was right.

Now 8-9 years later Tian had given me the final confirmation I needed. So I gave her below tip in front of her father who remained silent throughout.

When accused by another of being a thief, the thief would be stupid to admit it. Instead, thief will say accuser is mad. If one does not know the truth, don't follow blindly and call the accuser mad. It should instead be taken as a red flag and one should stay vigilant with the accused!


Another thing added more red flags.

On one visit, I was sitting in Tian's house when I saw that man bringing on a leash a male dog from her gandpa's house (a few hundred meters away) towards her house (which was owned by another uncle) but when I went out to the porch to say hello he did the same as above and quickly went off with the dog. Tian's house had a female Tibetan mastiff. This event was another red flag but I was yet to figure it out then.

Next visit months later, was told by Tian that female dog gave birth to a pup but she doesn't know how dog got pregnant. I clicked immediately but pretended not to know and asked if anyone told her how that came about (to see if anyone owned up). She said may be some dog sneaked into her house. I kept quiet and told myself 'sneaky bastard'.